Jessica Moe

So, I have a whole bunch of eggs in my fridge….it’s kind of the thing that I buy thinking I don’t have them, only to find out I have half a carton…and I never seem to get around to them before their expiration date, so inevitably I have eggs going into the trash.  Well, it just so happens that I inadvertently overbought eggs by a carton and a half last week and now I have half a carton of eggs that have passed their “sell by” date.  Since I have pretty much had it up to ”here” (she said, pointing to her chin) with throwing out eggs that may or may not be any good, I decided to figure out if there was some sort of standard of freshness…a smell, a look…I don’t know, something ANYTHING…it seems like the turn around is soo fast and eggs aren’t cheap, you know.

Alright, so I googled…and guess what!? There IS a way!

You can tell if an egg is fresh by putting it in water.  Fresh eggs will sink to the bottom, while not-fresh eggs will float. Eggs that floatish (i.e. bob around) are semi-fresh and apparently are still suitable for use….

So, there you go! Now you know.

I had to run out today to the grocery store and because I was only going to be gone for a few minutes, I didn’t bother to take my house keys or lock the door. I have two dogs and so I figure that since they FREAK out whenever even I come home that they would deter someone who was going to come in sans permission….I am ashamed to say this is kind of a common practice….Don’t come and rob me now, kay?
So, I pull into the driveway and I find a note curled up in my doorknob…either a take-out menu or a note from the property management telling us that the water will be shut down temporarily at such and such time…I get out of the car and pluck the note from its resting place:

“Dear Resident:

Please see the attached press release from the Newport Beach Police Department. We encourage you to call the number on the press release if you recognize anybody that fits the description - or see any other suspicious behavior.”

And so I look to the attached sheet…here is the e-version of what I found.

Ok, so if you read the description of what the guy did…it’s kind of funny:

On Sunday, June 22, at approximately 10:00 a.m., an unknown suspect entered an unlocked apartment in the 1700 block of Marguerite.  The suspect told the resident that he was on a fraternity scavenger hunt and had to dance for the resident.  Upon completing his dance, the suspect hugged the resident and placed his hand on her buttocks.  A similar incident occurred on April 12, 2008 in the 700 block of Begonia in Corona del Mar.  A similarly described suspect had entered the unlocked residence and told the residents he was in a fraternity and had to dance for them.  The suspect touched one of the resident’s hands prior to leaving.

Alright, so here’s the thing that really hit me: “an unknown suspect entered an unlocked apartment”

Got it. LOCK DOORS. Message received LOUD AND CLEAR. Thankyouverymuch.

But it doesn’t stop there…

So, I had left the television on for the girls while I was doing things today and when I returned, the show “It Takes a Thief” was on.  The show basically allows ex-thieves to break into someone’s house…the people agree to allow to have their house broken into, of course…it kind of tests their “security” or shows them how unsecured their home really is.  They get ransacked, crap gets broken…and their stuff? Gone!

Well, I walked into the living room in the midst of the “robbery”, and just as a woman walked unsuspectingly into the home where the “burglar” was hiding.  She was just walking around the house without a CLUE that the guy was still in there. EEK! OMG!  They showed him peering around the corner at her as she went on about her business.  SERIOUSLY!? CRAP!

Ok, I GET IT! Say no more! I-will-lock-the-door. What if that “robber” had been a “sexual predator”? I mean robbery is bad enough…As the robber later explained,  there was only one way in and one way out of this townhouse…if someone felt threatened by the person in the house, it could have been a lot worse…and there is only one way in and one way out of our home as well.

Needless to say, this was just the kick in the pants I needed to ramp up my personal security.

There are two new television shows this summer that I have been very excited to watch. One of them is “The Baby Borrowers” on NBC.  If you haven’t heard of it (which I am sure you have), the premise of the show is this: Five couples between the ages of 18 and 20 years old (most are 18 years old) are given a house and a kid (and one of them gets a job!)…for three days, they get a baby between 6 and 11 months, then they fast forward and get a toddler for three days, then three days of preteens and their pets, then teens for three days…and then, the elderly…

The premiere was on Wednesday of this week and I have to say that it was truly great! Issa was so annoyed when I recorded it on the DVR and fussed supreme when I insisted that we watch it, but he really got into it in the first couple of minutes–becoming exasperated by the ‘tudy teens “moms” and laughing his head off when one of the babies blew chunks.

One of the aspects that I didn’t particularly like is the real parents of the babies could step in at any time.  You know, these people aren’t “professionals”, they are parents who are just as likely as anyone else to make mistakes in the way that they handle things.  To allow them to come over with their nasty over-protective momtudes was not helpful.  I would have preferred to see the parents communicate with the ever present professional nannies and have the nannies communicate with the teen parents.  The harshness of these women was just the tipping point some of these couples needed to force them to give up even trying.  However, I will say that it almost seems that the real moms were told to be harsh to add to the stress of the already difficult scenario….

Example: One girl was feeling quite frustrated with her baby who wouldn’t eat because he was teething and feeling fussy.  Now, there are *some* child specialists who will say, when you kid is hungry–he/she will eat.  The real mom wanted baby kept on a strict schedule and was really pretty harsh on the girl when the girl gave up and said “Fine, starve!”…Well, we know the baby wasn’t going to starve…he was sucking on a bottle when the mom walked in…nevertheless the mother insisted she keep trying to feed the baby and didn’t seem to offer her any guidance beyond “Just make him eat”. That’s aggravating, and what’s more…as a nanny/future mom I am not sure force-feeding my child when they are hysterical and in pain would be my approach….

Nevertheless! This is an overall excellent social experiment, and while I doubt that it will prevent a 15 year old from getting knocked up, I think it takes the romanticism out of the notion that those borderline teens/adults might have when they *think* they are in a stable loving relationship (some of them seem to have critical relationship problems–especially the couple from GA) and during the honeymoon period it seems romantic to pop out a mini….For any young people in this age range, people who are smart enough to watch, smart enough to actually decide to try to get pregnant…this could be a good deterrent.

In sum, if you haven’t seen it, I suggest you check it out…you might decide its not for you but I have a feeling you might really enjoy it.

So, the other day I was in my car and listening to one of my favorite radio programs. Yes, I have favorite radio programs, don’t judge. The hosts like to rail against the idiocy of bureaucracy in both politics and the private sector…and as usual they had a small story they were using as sort of a “show opener”. Since it was local to me (and they are in L.A.) I thought it was interesting, and worth blogging about, in an effort to aid in the discussion about the availability of restrooms in commercial establishments…

The story goes a little something like this: A mother was with her 5-year-old daughter in Huntington Beach the other night and they stopped at Rocky Mountain Candy Company in the Bella Terra mall. While eating outside, the little girl was stricken by a case of explosive diarrhea and began “crying and screaming” to alert her mother of an impending disaster. The mother grabbed her daughter and ran into the store pleading with the employees to allow her little girl to use the ‘non-public’ restroom–they refused “multiple times” offering her no alternatives and lo-and-behold the child made good on her promise. She was forced to run across the way to a movie theater with both her daughter and herself covered in feces…

The day after the incident, the mother contacted the manager of the store and *this* is frankly where I get mad. The manager not only supported the decision of her employees, she also told the woman to “sue if it makes her happy” and when the mother threatened to use her connections to boycott the store, she laughed and said that she was “sure that would make [her] daughter very proud.”

Now, how obnoxious is that?! Ok, look…I will contend that after I have been pooped on, I am probably not the most pleasant or rational individual. I might even be a little snarky…but in my humble opinion, the onus is on the service provider to do their very best to attempt to provide excellent customer service, otherwise, there are PLENTY of other places that would be happy to have my business. So, while this mother could have been nasty and rude it wouldn’t have taken very much at all for the owner to say, “I am so terribly sorry for your trouble, please allow me to send you a gift certificate as an apology!” I can all but guarantee that this viral news story wouldn’t be an issue…in fact I venture to say it was the attitude *after* the fact that has caused the uproar.

Honestly, it just comes with the territory and ANYONE who has been in customer service knows this. If you don’t want to deal with the public, then don’t try to SELL STUFF to the PUBLIC! And hey, I am not saying anything about the drones they have working for them. If they are just reiterating company policy then so be it…but if you own or manage a store, this is YOUR decision…allow your employees and underlings to have some say-so…and RIGHT a WRONG!

Besides, being quite picky about my food, knowing a child had explosive diarrhea in their establishment…I wouldn’t even consider going there anyways. ICK!

Oh, so here’s the article…now it IS a franchise and I don’t believe in punishing the masses for the wrongs of a few but if you are ever in the Bella Terra mall and get a hankering for chocolate…go get some over-priced candy from the movie theater.

So, here I am…sitting in a pile of paperwork and junk…and I thought that in the spirit of organization I will share some of my favorite cleaning tips with you.  Now, these are things that I learned while watching cleaning shows like Clean Sweep and reading magazines like Real Simple…

I thought to post this as I found myself at the tail end of sorting through my papers, with a box of miscellaneous stuff like keepsake cards, unopened bills that I pay online, some CD’s and various membership cards among other things….Sometimes, you reach a point in organizing things that no matter what you do, you still have piles of stuff…they are just smaller. 

This is where one of my favorite most helpful rules comes in.  It is called the “One Touch” rule, and it is pretty straight forward.  Let’s say you are cleaning a room…the “One Touch” rule means that you will only touch an item one time. When you pick it up, you must send it to its proper place….otherwise, you will end up with pretty much the same mess you started with, just divided into piles all over your house or all over the room.  When it comes to doing something like sorting out your junk drawer, this is pretty difficult because you might not have a place to send your junk, which is why it ended up in the junk drawer in the first place.

There is an exception to this, and it is the “Keep, Sell, Toss” method. This could also be the “Keep, Donate, Toss” or “File, Shred, Toss” method.  About once every three months, I go through my paper box.  I bring out my bin of papers, along with two other bins and a trashcan. I put a post-it on one of the bins and label it “File” the other one is “Shred” and the trashcan is for non-confidential papers and envelopes. 

Another good rule is “The Task-it Basket”. I made up the name, but the principle is quite common.  The idea is that everyone in the house has a basket. When necessary–once a day, or once a week–you pull out your task-it basket and go around the house to find things that belong to you that need to be put away.  This is especially helpful in my house since we have three levels and often times things will make it from the first to the second floor…but not from the second to the third…or the reverse they will make it from the third floor to the second, but not to the first.  Sometimes, I will place specific tasks in a basket for Issa or myself…for example, I sorted through all of the paperwork and made a basket of his paperwork that he needs to sort through. That way, the mess is contained and the task can be tucked away if we can’t get to it just then.

Ok, that’s enough! I am tired and going to bed.