Archive for September, 2007

Tell Me You Love Me

Published by Jessica on September 30, 2007 in Television. 1 Comment

I don’t even know if I can admit to watching it. 

It is about 1:30 in the morning and Issa is going surfing in the morning.  On his way to bed, about an hour ago, he asked me for his rash guard and board shorts–well, I didn’t realize that he hadn’t given them to me after last weekend of surfing (I am only one woman, you know!)…and so they STINK! There is no way I could let him wear the icky ones that hadn’t been washed so I waited for the last load to be done in the washer and then put them in.  Of course, that means that I have to wait for the clothes in the dryer to be done so I can put his stuff in…

So I am sitting here completely tuned out and just kind of clicking around on the internet trying to stay awake when I realized that I was really watching this show that was on HBO–albeit passively.  It kind of sucked me in, you know…it was like one minute I wasn’t watching it and barely awake…and the next minute, I was consumed and barely breathing.

Ok, I know that this is a huge lead in just to say that I am HOOKED. I think the show is an hour long…it’s like the Sopranos or Big Love or something…it seemed a whole lot longer…

It’s about three couples who–to quote the HBO website, takes “an unfiltered look at three couples as they navigate critical periods in their lives”.  I couldn’t have put it better myself–and so I didn’t.

 OH MY GOSH. Honestly. I am really speechless. 

Now, I realize that anyone who is reading this probably hasn’t seen the show–and frankly I think that for most of the people close to me it might be a little too “gritty”…one of the central themes is the complexity of sex and intimacy in a relationship….Here’s a quote from the website:

“Capturing both the awkwardness and closeness of each couple, Mort opens a window into the complexities of modern relationships. Thought-provoking, raw and immediate, ‘Tell Me You Love Me’ teases out the unspoken dreams, hang-ups and fears that materialize when sex and intimacy connect – or when they diverge. ”

Needless to say, there is a lot of nudity and strong language..but the thing is–you feel…YOU FEEL.

Watching this show is like being the proverbial fly on the wall.  You know that fantasy that you can make yourself invisible?? The one where you could walk into the room and nobody could see you…you could hear people talking and see people walking around…and they went on about their lives and you could watch their every move.  It was like the characters were living…not acting….like you were watching their lives for an hour.

Let me give you two examples:

One of the couples, Carolyn and Palek, are in their mid-thirties and trying to conceive.  They have been trying unsuccessfully for a year and it is clearly taking its toll on them.  Palek suggests that they go to a friends house for a gathering and Carolyn agrees–clearly not wanting to go but understanding that it was important to him. At the friends house, during the evening it is revealed that one of the couples is pregnant for the third time…Palek blurts out that they had been trying too, no success, but they had both been to the doctor and checked out fine and that his sperm count is normal…I got chills–OH MY GOSH…I felt the same heaviness that Carolyn must have felt…the sense of falling through the furniture, having that aired out in the open–to people who wouldn’t understand.  The next scene shows them returning to their house. She is mad and he is trying to convince her that it was no big deal. She won’t have it and so he storms out of the room and she regrets being so cold…

Carolyn follows him in the other room and tries to convince him not to be mad at her…he is staring at his laptop and she asks him not to tune out–he tells her to leave him alone. She clearly feels badly for acting the way she did possibly recognizing that she was being a little self-indulgent in her anger and she tries to kiss him but he pulls away, angry.  She keeps going and he keeps refusing–irritated–and its clear she’s not certain if he’s serious or not and at the point when she feels like she wants to give up on trying to get him to forgive her…he meets her kiss and there is an intense and angry “intimate” scene where it seems that both of them realize that they aren’t truly angry at each other but at their situation…and they take it out on each other. Riveting is really the only way I can describe the unspoken subtext of this interaction.

The second example is the couple in their forties, Katie and Dave, who on their 12th anniversary find themselves having not had sex in over a year…

It’s complicated, but long story short, their young daughter helps Dave pick a gift for Katie–her selection?? A lace purple corset/lingerie set. Later that evening, the couple is at dinner with their young children when the daughter insists that her mother open the gift while they are eating. In the middle of the restaurant, she unwraps the highly personal gift and there is a moment where she realizes what it is and it seems that she also–in that same moment–realizes that the simple fact that she was given the gift in such an impersonal circumstance, meant that Dave had never actually pictured her wearing it…or did he?

Later that evening they share an intensely uncomfortable moment. After a cold, awkward kiss she tells him she is going to go take a shower and when she returns from the shower he wants to show her something “cool” on the TiVo she bought him for their anniversary. Out of nowhere, he turns to her and says “I love you, Kate.” and she looks at him for a moment and then says “But what?” Dave opens his mouth slowly as if to say something…and thinks better of it…she repeats the question…but he just stares at her, and she just stares at him…and you can physically feel the pain between them–WHAT is going ON!? You wonder–ANSWER THE QUESTION, DAVE!! BUT WHAT!?!

It’s too late though, she is already walking out the door with her book…

HEARTWRENCHING!

Anyways, if you get around to watching an episode of it…you might like it.  It’s pretty intense. I can’t wait for the next episode…I could relate to so many nuances throughout and it gave me a sense of normalcy…for anyone in a relationship, I suggest watching with an open mind…who knows?? The therapist who helps the three couples in the show just might help you too!! 

Tai– Tales of a dog mom…

Published by Jessica on September 29, 2007 in General. 2 Comments

Well, I have thought about posting on here for a few weeks and just haven’t gotten around to it.  It’s not that there isn’t a whole lot to talk about, I mean there is…

Take last weekend, for example–we came home from dinner and a movie one night to find that Ally was extremely ill. After a long night–I stayed on the couch with her–we took her into the doctor and she was hospitalized with a significatly high fever.  Normal temp for a dog is about 101-102…but hers was 106.5 which is as dangerous for a dog as it is for a human.

Being the dog-mom that I am, I was freaked out and crying. I felt so helpless watching her with a cone on her head and the IV in her doggie arm. She gave me this look like–who are these people, why do I have a shaved patch and a needle in me and why am I here?? 

I felt as though I was the worst person, worst dog-mom, in the world for leaving her that night. Thankfully, she was able to come home the next day and although she ate tentatively for the first day or so–and we weren’t sure if she was going to recover or if this was going to be an illness that we had to get to the bottom of–by wednesday she was scarfing food like she had never had a bite to eat in her whole life!

So, I guess all that to say that she is better now but scared the crap out of me and I realized that even though she barks and whines and demands things of me and forgets that she is a dog and I am her human…I am so glad to have her around.  She and Erin are so precious to me and their loving little hearts have brought so much joy into our lives…

So much so that this morning–just before six o’clock…Issa and I were fast asleep when we were startled awake by our little animal Ally when she jumped on the door and pressed the handle down with her paw. She had escaped from her room and come upstairs to sleep with mommy and daddy.  Unfortunatly for her our gigantic bed precluded her from jumping on us as usual, but she crawled under the bed and made herself comfortable. 

I, of course, had to bring her back downstairs…but it was a happy moment for me…and I spent a few minutes with her on the couch relishing the return of her spunk. I love my Ally. I love my Erin. I am thankful for the gift they have been in my life. 

On The Agenda This Year: Better Health

Published by Jessica on September 13, 2007 in General. 3 Comments

So, it really didn’t take very long for me to realize that my husband was making me fat.

Let me clarify.

My husband LOVES food. At breakfast he is planning lunch, at lunch he is planning dinner…dinner he is playing out what kind of cereal he is going to eat before he goes to bed.

What’s worse, he hates to eat alone. So, he convinces me each and every single time to eat with him and sadly for me…I have no self-control. I smell a chili dog and go hog wild. Sure, I will take the 2 for 2.22! Anyways, at the end of the day I wind up feeling like the crap that I ate. While he goes and runs 6 miles and works it off–ending up looking better and feeling better!

So, now that he is at work I am able to pace myself and make smarter food choices.

I decided that I would offically make this a commitment to myself come Wednesday when I his the big 2-5. So, I went to the grocery store and I went SHOPPING. I took my time and went down every aisle. While most food experts suggest that you shouldn’t go grocery shopping while you are hungry, I disagree…because, you see…what ends up happening for me is that I think “Oh, I would eat this if I wanted a snack.”–like rice cakes…but no. They end up sitting there for ages and I wind up looking in my pantry thinking “Ugh, I don’t have anything–I guess I have to go out…”

So, I went shopping and I did it while I was hungry. Amazingly, I found things like wheat thins that sounded good…and I was careful to select things that were labeled “No trans fat”. Instead of pop tarts, I chose cereal bars…and instead of Nutri Grain, I chose the Quaker Oats brand because not only did they have a clear label marked “No Trans Fat” they were better in overall nutrition content. See this write up on that particular product comparison. I won’t run you through all of the choices that I made but one of them was a new yogurt by yoplait called Yo-Plus. It has the same pro-biotic formula as Activia but since this one was on sale and the fruit flavors were more appealing…

Anyways, I figured that if there were any benefit derived from their digestive enzyme thing that would be a bonus because at the very least having some yogurt in the morning would be good for me. So for the past three mornings (huge success–three days, I know…but it’s a start!) I have had yogurt (peach or vanilla–both are DELICIOUS and I am not a huge yogurt fan) and an apple…and a bottle of water and frankly I can go three hours before I am hungry again!

I feel lighter and not in a weight sense, in a functional and operational sense….

So, I have decided that this is my commitment to myself and my family for this year (and hopefully for a lifetime) I am going to make smarter food choices. It is remarkably easy when you realize how much better you feel when you do and you don’t do so by depriving yourself…you know? I mean, it’s easy to say you are going to try the lemonade diet but ICK…who REALLY wants to do THAT?

Anyways…to help me be accountable to myself for what I am eating, I am going to enlist the services of a website I sang the praises of on here some time ago www.fitday.com.  I am going to keep a food journal religiously and at the end of the month I will determine which vitamins I am lacking and find supplements that will fit the way that I eat.

I am really excited because this feels like a game to figure out how to feed my body the things that it needs…

Wish me luck!

Happy Work, Baby!

Published by Jessica on September 10, 2007 in General. 1 Comment

Well, this morning my hubby is off to work on his first big-boy job and it is hard to believe that this day is finally here! It felt like this would never come  and now that we are here I realize just how grown-up we’ve become!

All the things that came before this….the late nights, the tummy aches…all the different first days that came before…First day at college, first day at UVA, first day at law school, first day at Penn….our wedding day, our moving days….his first day at Enterprise….first day of his summer internship…

Then, this morning…hopefully the last first for a while….but a first to treasure, for sure.

I am almost speechless. I really can’t find the words to say what this means or how I feel. This feels like graduation day, in a way….I mean, a ceremony is one thing…but sending him off to work, knowing that this is finally the stage of life that my parents were in when I met them for the first time ;-) It feels like a homecoming and a coming out.

Anyways, enough deep-thinking gushiness. Really, ok…

Good luck, honey! You are going to do so well, you always have. Whatever you put your mind to, you make something amazing out of–something unexpected….

I love you, Baby! Happy work! 

A Moement of Disbelief…..

Published by Jessica on September 8, 2007 in General. 1 Comment

We have been having a heckuvatime with our cable box. During important programming, such as The Daily Show, it will randomly shut down and take a few minutes to reload thereby depriving us momentarily of the snarky political commentary of Jon Stewart. In our household, this simply will not stand and so we packed it up and put it in the car, planning to take it to the Cox store at some point during our errands today.

Well, 6:30 rolls around and we find ourselves about 25 minutes away from the Cox store and there was traffic…So, we RUSHED down to the store and pulled up at 7:01  the gentleman (and I use the term loosely) was flipping the sign from “open” to “closed”. I mean, I hit the doorstep at the same time he was flicking his wrist to lock the door.

I gave him the puppy dog eyes and pouted my lip a bit and to my amazement, he didn’t waiver. He gave me the fake I-can’t-hear-you-res-ipsa-look. Not to be deterred, I showed him my cell phone that was still reflecting 7:00…I shouted a little and over enunciated a tad, made my eyes really wide–for his benefit, of course–as if he couldn’t hear me between the inch and a half gap in the door….”I JUST NEED TO SWITCH MY CABLE BOX”, I said.

Curtly, he said…”We’re closed, you’ll have to come back tomorrow.”

Just then, a customer who had been inside the store walked up behind him and needed to be let out. Much to his chagrin, he had to open the door for her and I took the opportunity to pleadingly say, “But, we just drove 25 minutes to GET here.”

He points to the sign indicating the hours and restated that they were closed and he was sorry but there was nothing he could do for us….he said that it was up to his supervisor and that his supervisor was very inflexible on that. “Besides, he said, it’s 7:05.”

Issa blurted, “YEAH! Well, we have been standing here arguing with you for four minutes!” to which he replied, “Legally, speaking we close AT 7:00…that is–my supervisor is not going to tell you anything different.”

It was at that point that Issa and I chorused “Well, then we are going to need to speak to your supervisor.”

(LEAGLLY SPEAKING?? I mean, poor guy…seriously…WHO did he think he was talking to?? My husband just spent the last three years covering every area of the law and the last three months studying specifically California state law and nowhere in there did it ever say that COX closes at 7:00 on the nose–legally speaking…that was the best he could come up with.)

He rolled his eyes and said that we would have to wait outside and he would see if the supervisor would speak with us. 

So, we waited. We waited and waited and about five minutes rolled by and another customer needed to be let out and he said “My supervisor MIGHT come and speak with you.”

So, we waited and waited some more…all the while looking in the HUGE glass doors watching 5 or 6 unoccupied employees pretend to look busy shuffeling paper around and then this guy, who we had been watching do busy work behind the counter for the last 10 minutes, comes leisurely walking to the door. “We’re closed.”

We were expecting you to say that, I know that is what we were both thinking but Issa said, “We don’t have a cash transaction, we just need you to go and switch this cable box for another one that works.”

My goodness! You would have thought that we had asked him to donate a section of his liver to save his meddling mother-in-law! As if he were doing us the biggest favor in the world he takes the cable box, trades it for one in the store, and within a matter of two minutes we were on our way. Oh, but not before he reminded us that from now on we should be aware that they close at seven. Dually noted, jerkface.

I have never in my life been privy to such straight faced absurdity. I would be pissed were it not for the fact that the episode in its retelling is quite entertaining and somewhat Seinfeldian. 

Decor & More!

Published by Jessica on September 6, 2007 in General. 0 Comments

So, something has come to my attention, something that had been right in front of my face but that I had never considered fully and yet on a recent shopping trip, there it was–as it always had been…and for some reason, this time I crossed paths with it and noticed it with fresh eyes…on this day, it smacked me in the face while I was perusing the aisles at Target…

It’s a concept…a phenomenon, really…one that I quite possibly would never have had the ability to relate to until this very moment…being in a position where I am attempting to find my color palate and I have a home full of neutral furniture and white walls…

Oh, sure…I have heard it mentioned once or twice before…even noticed it in the history books or tours of old homes….but never had it been terribly apparent that it still went on…until, of course…today.

Are you ready?

Decorating your home for the seasons.

I know. On paper it doesn’t sound like an outrageous thing, I mean you think–of course! Everyone hangs a fall wreath here, a carved pumpkin there and come Christmas time…we break out the Christmas cookie jar and the Christmas tree….but never had it occured to me that there are some people who would implement such extreme holiday decor measures that they would do this or this!

Ok, I know no huge revelation here for most of you (probably) but the thing is that you would really have to make sure that the rest of your room could handle such a statement…and what’s more, where in the heck do you store everything when you are done with it?? I mean that’s a whole lot of storage…

I think it caught my eye, the season specific decor, because I really like bright and bold colors and yet I find myself not wanting to do anything that is too “fall” or too “summer” that will be to the exclusion of the aforementioned holiday decor….and it just sort of hit me that people will change art on their walls, decor items on their shelves…towels…sheets…EVERYTHING according to season….

Seems like a whole heck of a lot of work to me and yet–intriguing.

Bloghaustion…

Published by Jessica on September 1, 2007 in General. 0 Comments

That’s the only word I can think of to describe it. I get ready to type a blog entry and my eyelids become overwhelmingly heavy. Right now my breathing is slowed and I am in that twilight ready to sleep…

I would like to talk about the crazy weather tonight, the heavy rain and thunder…how it reminded me of El Nino…

I was going to blog about how one should arrange a bookshelf for both decorative effect and utility…and I was contemplating complaining about freshly scented doggie poopie bags…I was going to bemoan my overindulgence on snack sized candy….

Instead, I am going to go to bed….

Love you all! Goodnight!